secondary activities
Since I royally screwed myself after being royally screwed multiple times by the education department (they made it look like so much fun that I had to give it a try), I must make up for time. Currently, my work is submitted to the committee and I can’t do anything so I have a minute to rant. Here it is.
So I’m screwed for time. Time, time, time. I must save time so I limited my internet, television (one football game Sunday, then on Monday, maybe Conan if I can’t sleep), free reading (cancelled), and yard care (I enjoy yard work to a fault). However, as mentioned before, I have a painfully short attention span. So I devised activities I could do while working on my portfolio and studying for my English department content test and Biology Test. They really weren’t much for activities—more like product testing. Regardless, these activities tricked my mind into thinking it was doing more than mere writing and studying. The results for my secondary activites are in.
Crest White Strips. Why I decided that I needed to whiten my teeth, I’m not sure. Maybe it’s the barrage of blindingly white smiles attacking me from all forms of visual media….kinda like dieting. Regardless of why, I wasted $25 on Crest White strips. Yes, wasted. My teeth do not appear any whiter than before. No sunshades are needed to view my smile. Crest, you suck. If you want whiter teeth, I suggest picking one of the bizillion other choices because Crest sucks for certain. The only thing that keeps them from failing is that it was, in fact, easy to apply. And yes, I followed the directions.
Product Rating: D
Colgate Maxfresh Toothpaste with Mini Breath Strips: --experience a whole new dimension of freshness. Not really. I didn’t notice much of a difference from my regular Colgate toothpaste. I expected a “way too much mint” sensation upon use. I received a lacking of new dimension sensation. It is toothpaste, it does get the teeth clean and it does leave you with fresh breath (until you drink some more coffee). I can’t fail it. It’s your average toothpaste. I don’t know how to rate toothpaste when it’s effective. However, it did not live up to its claim.
Product Rating: stick with your usual toothpaste
Aveeno anti-wrinkle cream. I have wrinkles on my forehead that make me look like I’m surprised all the time. They aren’t deep, but they are there. Don’t look too close, I may headbutt you for getting that close—just take my word for it. After two and a half weeks of use, I don’t see much of an improvement, but it is a nice moisturizer. It’s non-greasy and hasn’t caused any acne.
Product Rating: B-
Tylenol Sore Throat, Maximum Strength (why take anything but maximum strength?): I didn’t have a sore throat, but I couldn’t sleep, hadn't slept, and due to the lack of sleep over the course of a few days, i wasn't functional--i needed sleep. I didn’t have any Nyquil. This stuff has 1000 milligrams of acetaminophen in one dose. I took two of the little plastic shot glasses worth. Out like a light.
One plastic shotglass worth is excellent for tense muscles (shoulders, neck). i feel a lot more relaxed after a swig from this bottle. i think this will become another staple to my medicine shelves.
Product Rating: A+
Queen Helene Mint Julep Mud Masque: Green goop to put on my face and scare people—an immediate appeal. After feeling like papier-mâché paste had been crusted onto my skin, I was ready to wash the pleasant smelling, green goop off. After removing it, my face was tender but the redness went away after a few hours. To be fair, most skin products cause the same reaction on my skin—I can’t blame queen helene for being harsh. My skin felt smooth and my pores did look a little better. This product is much cheaper than others that I have used and had similar if not better results. did i mention that it smelled nice?
Product Rating: A
Infusium 23 Moisturizing Leave-in Treatment—Not a bad investment. My hair feels nice, and healthier albeit a bit oily by the end of the day. I should have gone with the spray option because the squirty-like applicator was messy and I’m a naturally messy person, making a mess and wasting product….the bathroom carpet doesn’t look any better… . It smells ok, but a little medicinal.
Product Rating B+
In short, that’s what I’ve been up to outside of work and school. Oh and I saw the movie The Grudge. If you have a product you would like tested (guys, I can’t test the penis enhancers, sorry) let me know. I have the time….
So I’m screwed for time. Time, time, time. I must save time so I limited my internet, television (one football game Sunday, then on Monday, maybe Conan if I can’t sleep), free reading (cancelled), and yard care (I enjoy yard work to a fault). However, as mentioned before, I have a painfully short attention span. So I devised activities I could do while working on my portfolio and studying for my English department content test and Biology Test. They really weren’t much for activities—more like product testing. Regardless, these activities tricked my mind into thinking it was doing more than mere writing and studying. The results for my secondary activites are in.
Crest White Strips. Why I decided that I needed to whiten my teeth, I’m not sure. Maybe it’s the barrage of blindingly white smiles attacking me from all forms of visual media….kinda like dieting. Regardless of why, I wasted $25 on Crest White strips. Yes, wasted. My teeth do not appear any whiter than before. No sunshades are needed to view my smile. Crest, you suck. If you want whiter teeth, I suggest picking one of the bizillion other choices because Crest sucks for certain. The only thing that keeps them from failing is that it was, in fact, easy to apply. And yes, I followed the directions.
Product Rating: D
Colgate Maxfresh Toothpaste with Mini Breath Strips: --experience a whole new dimension of freshness. Not really. I didn’t notice much of a difference from my regular Colgate toothpaste. I expected a “way too much mint” sensation upon use. I received a lacking of new dimension sensation. It is toothpaste, it does get the teeth clean and it does leave you with fresh breath (until you drink some more coffee). I can’t fail it. It’s your average toothpaste. I don’t know how to rate toothpaste when it’s effective. However, it did not live up to its claim.
Product Rating: stick with your usual toothpaste
Aveeno anti-wrinkle cream. I have wrinkles on my forehead that make me look like I’m surprised all the time. They aren’t deep, but they are there. Don’t look too close, I may headbutt you for getting that close—just take my word for it. After two and a half weeks of use, I don’t see much of an improvement, but it is a nice moisturizer. It’s non-greasy and hasn’t caused any acne.
Product Rating: B-
Tylenol Sore Throat, Maximum Strength (why take anything but maximum strength?): I didn’t have a sore throat, but I couldn’t sleep, hadn't slept, and due to the lack of sleep over the course of a few days, i wasn't functional--i needed sleep. I didn’t have any Nyquil. This stuff has 1000 milligrams of acetaminophen in one dose. I took two of the little plastic shot glasses worth. Out like a light.
One plastic shotglass worth is excellent for tense muscles (shoulders, neck). i feel a lot more relaxed after a swig from this bottle. i think this will become another staple to my medicine shelves.
Product Rating: A+
Queen Helene Mint Julep Mud Masque: Green goop to put on my face and scare people—an immediate appeal. After feeling like papier-mâché paste had been crusted onto my skin, I was ready to wash the pleasant smelling, green goop off. After removing it, my face was tender but the redness went away after a few hours. To be fair, most skin products cause the same reaction on my skin—I can’t blame queen helene for being harsh. My skin felt smooth and my pores did look a little better. This product is much cheaper than others that I have used and had similar if not better results. did i mention that it smelled nice?
Product Rating: A
Infusium 23 Moisturizing Leave-in Treatment—Not a bad investment. My hair feels nice, and healthier albeit a bit oily by the end of the day. I should have gone with the spray option because the squirty-like applicator was messy and I’m a naturally messy person, making a mess and wasting product….the bathroom carpet doesn’t look any better… . It smells ok, but a little medicinal.
Product Rating B+
In short, that’s what I’ve been up to outside of work and school. Oh and I saw the movie The Grudge. If you have a product you would like tested (guys, I can’t test the penis enhancers, sorry) let me know. I have the time….
posted by Shy at 9:52 PM
6 Comments:
Cant you use the boyfriend to test the penis enhancer? As it is not attached to me I have very little problem in letting you try it out on him and a great deal of curiousity as to whether they work. I'm part Irish after all.
I'm going to take a stroll through the local CVS next time I'm out walking and see what strange products the shy should be a guinea pig for. Muhahahaha. I always wanted to be a mad scientist.
Education departments all over love to screw people. Especially when those people plan to be teachers but won't be getting a major in education but a minor. As I did.
They're the education department, you'd think that sharing information would be a raison d'etre and shit. But, sadly no. No dissemination at all. Bastards. I curse them for you.
Why is it that its always the mad scientist wanting to take over the world?
I think they are in it for the chicks. and the frothy bubbly vapors probably help with the dellusions
mmm frothy bubbly goodness
If there is no bubling green goo then its just not mad science.
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