Anticlimactic

So the train ride while uneventful provides a wonderful bounty to be plundered at a later date. Now we must debrief.

Coming up the subway tunnel from the red line at Grand Avenue One can see the Name on the of the Rock Bottom Restaurant & Brewery. One does not yet see the line of people. Arriving three hours early may have paid off. But wait come up further from the subterranean train and a mass of people is visible all the way down the block. One must laugh. Hit the corner of Grand and Dearborn and the line turns and heads a half block to the alley. It appears to end there. This is an illusion. The line turns the corner at the alley and winds all the way back to jus behind the restaurant. This is where I step in somewhere just before eight in the morning.

The people in front of me are from St. Louis. They drove down last night. They wife is here to apply. The husband came to see Chicago. He wont see much as he needs to leave tonight. A woman who gets in line behind us asks us to hold her place. She is going to do an informal head count, try to figure out where we stand. By her count I'm 205. Later when they pass out numbers I'm actually 181. There are a number of people just along to pay meters and hold spots in line. The people near the front of the line have sleeping bags and folding chairs. I later find out from some family who are waiting for their loved ones to interview that they were about place number 50 in line and had been their since 4:30 am. Rumor has it that number one was in line some time around noon the day before.

A truck honks behind us it needs to get by. We all squeeze over. Someone yells for the truck to stop and goes over to wake up the street people sleeping on cardboard on the other side of the alley. I had not noticed them before. As the day progresses the line will eventually wind through their living space. People buy them coffee and talk to them while smoking. They must not fear TB or other airborne diseases that are known to be common among Chicago street people. I give em a wide berth.

I've never seen such a collection of jolly fat people. Laughing Happy People who really truly just want to change the way they look. By 11:00 am when the interviews are supposed to start there must be 700 hundred slap happy people standing in line joking around all secretly wondering what this guys or that guys chance to be on the show is. The guy behind me in line apparently has tried out before for the team competitions. He becomes the resident expert as he actually made it to a third interview. He tells his story to anyone who will listen and "reluctantly" gives advice about how people should act given the chance. Everyone is talking about "the show." They refer to the cast members by their given names, like friends or buddies. Talk drifts to other reality shows on occasion. All have opinions. I pull my hood further over my head as if to protect myself from the wind and appear to be attentive rather than zoning out. I wish I could pull a book out and read, but it is much to cold. The gloved hands must stay in the coat pockets.

I get near the front of the line and see what appears to be a plastic bad filled with yellow liquid on the ground. I wonder aloud, "Is that what I think it is?" A man answers, "You mean a bag of urine?" I nod. He nods. Everyone takes a few steps away. Many try to convince themselves that it is not, in fact, urine. I am fairly sure it is, but keep that to myself.

Finally at 1:30 in the afternoon we make it inside. They take us in groups of ten. It's like an over eater anonymous meeting. We sit in a circle. A skinny casting director asks, "If we had our own personal logo on our t-shirts for this event what would it be?" That is it. For the group of ten we might spend 10 minutes inside talking. Each person might get around 60 seconds with one of these casting agents. That is all. I listen to the other people and what is noticeably lacking is "I want to loose the weight for myself." Some want to be physically appealing. Some want to be around for the children. I am the only one to say that after my personal experience with my mothers heart attack and diabetic problems I need to loose weight for myself. I am the only one in ten who says while this may be a wonderful opportunity I'm going to loose weight on my own, that I am determined to help myself. For everyone else it is very much like the red neck retirement plan, they are playing the lottery.

I walk away feeling I haven't really had the opportunity to show myself. I walk away looking at all these fat people wondering how many will actually do anything to improve their lives. I'm cold, hungry and tired. I miss the 2:30 Metra and sit in the terminal waiting for the 3:25, a train filled with high school kids.

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