The Vexations of Obligatory Gift Giving
Perhaps i am ungrateful. Perhaps the other temps in this world would love to work in an office where the boss gives gifts. Perhaps i can go to hell without passing go or collecting $200 for moping my way around the store, begrudgingly looking for a gift to give in return, not thinking for a moment that it was a nice gesture, but a hindrance on my already few minutes of spare time. Or, perhaps I am reasonable. i argue this last option.
After all, i am a temp. And while a snowman cookie jar is a nice thought (it is cute), i don’t really have the cash to be buying and receiving gifts for everyone in the office, nor do I have the storage space for the cute cookie jar that i now feel obligated to keep.
So, after work, i found myself at Target (my snowman cookie jar cost my boss 14.99, by the way—by coincidence, also a Target gift) looking for a gift for my boss. I bought him a cedar bird feeder. I also picked up a few popcorn tins while I was there to cover any other unexpected, unwanted gifts. At least popcorn is edible—and if they don’t want it, they can bring it/leave it out at the family gathering.
My question is since when did gift giving become office etiquette? Or why, for that matter. Yes. I care about my co-workers. This is why I bring in cookies, pretzels, and what ever little snacky thing that I might have for the purpose of sharing. But what if I really didn’t celebrate Christmas (I claimed not to—in front of everyone (all four of us) when I was asked if I finished my Christmas shopping) I thought that blatantly refusing to order decorations for the office or to decorate the office went without saying that I did not want to take part in the festivities. Or is it just me feeling obligated to return a gift when one is given? When I give gifts—surprises, birthdays, anniversaries, and so forth, I don’t expect anything in return. But in the case of Christmas, The gifts are given the same day—how to clarify?—On a birthday, Bobby’s falls on a different date than mine, thus he doesn’t have to give me anything, let alone feel obligated to do it on the spot or by the next day as to not look cheap. Now don't get me wrong, I really enjoy buying gifts for friends and family. I just don't like the unexpected, not so genuine, gift.
So maybe I am ungrateful. I sure am anti-Christmas—at least the hallmark version, anyway. Should I not pass go or collect $200 for feeling inconvenienced by a gift? Probably. Would it make it worse if I claimed to be Jewish and decorated my desk with a menorah, right next to Basher, the dinosaur?
After all, i am a temp. And while a snowman cookie jar is a nice thought (it is cute), i don’t really have the cash to be buying and receiving gifts for everyone in the office, nor do I have the storage space for the cute cookie jar that i now feel obligated to keep.
So, after work, i found myself at Target (my snowman cookie jar cost my boss 14.99, by the way—by coincidence, also a Target gift) looking for a gift for my boss. I bought him a cedar bird feeder. I also picked up a few popcorn tins while I was there to cover any other unexpected, unwanted gifts. At least popcorn is edible—and if they don’t want it, they can bring it/leave it out at the family gathering.
My question is since when did gift giving become office etiquette? Or why, for that matter. Yes. I care about my co-workers. This is why I bring in cookies, pretzels, and what ever little snacky thing that I might have for the purpose of sharing. But what if I really didn’t celebrate Christmas (I claimed not to—in front of everyone (all four of us) when I was asked if I finished my Christmas shopping) I thought that blatantly refusing to order decorations for the office or to decorate the office went without saying that I did not want to take part in the festivities. Or is it just me feeling obligated to return a gift when one is given? When I give gifts—surprises, birthdays, anniversaries, and so forth, I don’t expect anything in return. But in the case of Christmas, The gifts are given the same day—how to clarify?—On a birthday, Bobby’s falls on a different date than mine, thus he doesn’t have to give me anything, let alone feel obligated to do it on the spot or by the next day as to not look cheap. Now don't get me wrong, I really enjoy buying gifts for friends and family. I just don't like the unexpected, not so genuine, gift.
So maybe I am ungrateful. I sure am anti-Christmas—at least the hallmark version, anyway. Should I not pass go or collect $200 for feeling inconvenienced by a gift? Probably. Would it make it worse if I claimed to be Jewish and decorated my desk with a menorah, right next to Basher, the dinosaur?
posted by Shy at 6:43 PM
4 Comments:
I hate that it invades the workplace in much the same way as it drives me nuts that it invades the schools. Half the time I want to scream, "my faith is not your faith! stop calling me a bah humbug because I dont want to celebrate your faith you (expicative deleted) (explicative delted) (F and A hint hint)."
I totally agree - the holidays are stressful enough w/o having to worry about what meaningless trinket to buy your boss/employees/co-workers. Ugh. Obligation takes the fun out of the season...
Rich:
Yeah, being called a bahumbug for not wanting to participate in the white elephant gift exchange is ridiculous. I don't want something you don't want. If i did, I would go to the thrift store.
Jenny:
You hit the nail on the head. Obligatory gift giving takes the fun out of giving a gift and the guilt for not giving the gift is somehow worse.
PGF:
I'm glad someone else saw the thing and laughed. I try to give things that i think other people can use--not something that they have to store 11 out of 12 months...(for the extremists, it's only 10 months and that's still a long time to store stuff). I must admit that I didn’t have one, but if anyone else gets me a snowman cookie jar, I won’t be able to keep it.
I would blam everything on US pop culture. Threw mass media we are told what we have to do and how to act by who ever can pay for the TV spots. This then starts a chain reaction of sorts. The weak willed minds affected but such a thing then affect the people who mainly dont care about the holidays. Makeing there life a little more troubeing. Im sure in the futur no one is going to know what the hoildays are all about and how they started. There is one thing I would like to know if you dont believe in god or jesus then how can you take part in Christmas??? I dont mean this toward the poster more of a self thought.
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