Youth Culture Uniforms
My next billion dollar business idea: Youth Culture Uniforms. I'm going to make a killing. Ok I think we've hit that point where every last bit of the youth culture experience has been branded and we can just open up giant uniform shops all across the nation.
For the would be hippy we have premade tie dye's, hemp jewelry, day glow poster, black lights, earth tones, incense and "paperless tobacco Smoking devices." From here they can choose a number of paths the beatnick artist with journals or sketch pads, or a complete collection of every Grateful Dead recording. One might also consider a set of bongo drums. Add to this the once a month need it or not bathing kit.
The Goth kids get a complete black wardrobe. Perhaps a little white or red thrown in here to draw more attention to all the darkness in their lives but 85 % of the wardrobe must be black. We have some nifty accessories. Removable fangs for the would be vampire. White makeup for those sad occasions when you actually get a touch of sun. The complete works of Emily Dickinson. ("He kindly stopped for me"). A Vincent Price doll with spooky voice action. Tarot. Voodoo Dolls. New age spells. Crystal.
The eXtreme crew come with 100 % baggy clothing (the bottoms of the pants are preferably frayed and walked on). Choose skateboard, mountain bike, snowboard, or slacker hanger on (aka the man with the weed). Also comes with "paperless tobacco smoking device" (hitter, bong, hooka, pipe). The eXtreme crew doesn't require literacy, or even much in the way of verbal communication.
The all American kids can have all that nifty clothing with their college names branded across chest and ass. No girl can go without the ball cap to pull the hair through. The Greek letter collection Also available.
Lets not forget Nerdcore (where I have my roots). Nerdcore is all about the T - shirts, novelty t-shirts. Apocolyspse Cow. Transformer logos. There can be only one. Cowbell Fever. These are but a few of the things that can grace a Nerdcore shirt. The computer is a major accessory, though any sort of technical gadget / toy is appropriate. Nerdcore has it's own music. Star Wars Gangsta Rap. All Your Base Are Belong to us. Lotion.
With just one uniform store we can help kids find their high school and college identities. Just one trip around one of our monster outlets and they will have an idea of all the groups that are out there waiting to accept them. No more will they need to spend hours in the mall trying to match up bits and pieces from different stops. No need to actually go to a thrift shop to get used clothes. Just hit Youth Culture Uniforms and they kind find out who they are today. Heck with any trade in we could offer a discount on their next purchased identity.
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For the would be hippy we have premade tie dye's, hemp jewelry, day glow poster, black lights, earth tones, incense and "paperless tobacco Smoking devices." From here they can choose a number of paths the beatnick artist with journals or sketch pads, or a complete collection of every Grateful Dead recording. One might also consider a set of bongo drums. Add to this the once a month need it or not bathing kit.
The Goth kids get a complete black wardrobe. Perhaps a little white or red thrown in here to draw more attention to all the darkness in their lives but 85 % of the wardrobe must be black. We have some nifty accessories. Removable fangs for the would be vampire. White makeup for those sad occasions when you actually get a touch of sun. The complete works of Emily Dickinson. ("He kindly stopped for me"). A Vincent Price doll with spooky voice action. Tarot. Voodoo Dolls. New age spells. Crystal.
The eXtreme crew come with 100 % baggy clothing (the bottoms of the pants are preferably frayed and walked on). Choose skateboard, mountain bike, snowboard, or slacker hanger on (aka the man with the weed). Also comes with "paperless tobacco smoking device" (hitter, bong, hooka, pipe). The eXtreme crew doesn't require literacy, or even much in the way of verbal communication.
The all American kids can have all that nifty clothing with their college names branded across chest and ass. No girl can go without the ball cap to pull the hair through. The Greek letter collection Also available.
Lets not forget Nerdcore (where I have my roots). Nerdcore is all about the T - shirts, novelty t-shirts. Apocolyspse Cow. Transformer logos. There can be only one. Cowbell Fever. These are but a few of the things that can grace a Nerdcore shirt. The computer is a major accessory, though any sort of technical gadget / toy is appropriate. Nerdcore has it's own music. Star Wars Gangsta Rap. All Your Base Are Belong to us. Lotion.
With just one uniform store we can help kids find their high school and college identities. Just one trip around one of our monster outlets and they will have an idea of all the groups that are out there waiting to accept them. No more will they need to spend hours in the mall trying to match up bits and pieces from different stops. No need to actually go to a thrift shop to get used clothes. Just hit Youth Culture Uniforms and they kind find out who they are today. Heck with any trade in we could offer a discount on their next purchased identity.
More Laters
posted by Rich Rosenthal II at 2:48 AM
1 Comments:
It's not so much a "kids these days" thing with me as it is a kind of wodner that skaters today are still wearing the same baggy outfits they were wearing when I was a kind. The movement can change or die but the uniform lives on. go downtown and you can still see people in full spike green hair punk. Weird
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