Get Your Mind Out of the Gutter

My Hat

I'm going bald so I usually wear a hat if I have to go out in the sun. Scalp burn is not my idea of a good time. Women see the hat and their minds go right into the gutter. They are like, "So you're pretty big huh?" and I act the Smart ass with a, "Yeah, 6 foot 3."

When they correct me with the wink, the smile and the knowing checking out of the pants, I gotta say, "Me, big? No, I'm Irish." People usually don't get this. (The Irish usually take offense.)

I started wearing the hat because I like the spreading the message that we should make no small plans and dream no small dreams. If it wasn't for the entire Irish factor I probably wouldn't mind the advertisement of package size. Trying to explain the difference in a situation that matters (like when yas both have your clothes off) would probably a bit difficult.

"But your hat said to Think Big."

"And that's not what your getting so you better start imagining."

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