West Nile, WEST NILE!
When asked to go outside and fetch something from the store that is how I respond. The all capital letters and exclamation point are there to show how my voice rises in not just volume but pitch in a crazed sort of way so as to express how I truly feel about the idea of me going outside of the house, for an extended period in this city of Chicago, where we have already had a couple cases of west nile illness this season and there are rabid mosquitoes lurking in every little warm wet place ready to pounce on me with their poison filled stingers to kill me dead. "West Nile, WEST NILE!" Think Soylent Green
crazy.
I still go out and get them whatever they need as they support me and I'm in no real position to refuse (and I often get to keep the change and add a couple dollars to my meager supply). But first I coat myself head to toe in mosquito repellent. Now part of me is wondering, "Are they still using that carcinogenic stuff in all these bug repellents?" I just have to live with the possible gruesome death later as opposed to immediate threat of gruesome death now. Thinking about this too much can keep one up late at night staring at the ceiling, scared to go to sleep.
One might think I'm a bit too paranoid about this entire West Nile thing. Once upon a time the Beverly area was filled with crows. They were everywhere. You didn't want to fill the bird feeder there were so many crows. And then they were gone. West Nile wiped em out. I saw a crow fall dead out of a tree in front of an old man a couple years back and that man was dead a couple days later. While his death had nothing to do with West Nile and everything to do with being a rather sick old man, it still left a lasting impression. Dead Crows falling out of trees freaky.
So I'm out walking the other night a couple miles out and I realize, I'm not protected! The Deep Woods Off Wipes are sitting on the table unused. I want to quickly run inside the Walgreens I'm passing and curl up in the fetal position for a little cry by the bug repellent rack. Instead I just keep walking because at heart sometimes I'm more cheap than paranoid.
In conclusion: The next time someone asks you to do something you don't want to do just scream, "West Nile, WEST NILE!" They'll leave you alone. I Guarantee it.
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crazy.I still go out and get them whatever they need as they support me and I'm in no real position to refuse (and I often get to keep the change and add a couple dollars to my meager supply). But first I coat myself head to toe in mosquito repellent. Now part of me is wondering, "Are they still using that carcinogenic stuff in all these bug repellents?" I just have to live with the possible gruesome death later as opposed to immediate threat of gruesome death now. Thinking about this too much can keep one up late at night staring at the ceiling, scared to go to sleep.
One might think I'm a bit too paranoid about this entire West Nile thing. Once upon a time the Beverly area was filled with crows. They were everywhere. You didn't want to fill the bird feeder there were so many crows. And then they were gone. West Nile wiped em out. I saw a crow fall dead out of a tree in front of an old man a couple years back and that man was dead a couple days later. While his death had nothing to do with West Nile and everything to do with being a rather sick old man, it still left a lasting impression. Dead Crows falling out of trees freaky.
So I'm out walking the other night a couple miles out and I realize, I'm not protected! The Deep Woods Off Wipes are sitting on the table unused. I want to quickly run inside the Walgreens I'm passing and curl up in the fetal position for a little cry by the bug repellent rack. Instead I just keep walking because at heart sometimes I'm more cheap than paranoid.
In conclusion: The next time someone asks you to do something you don't want to do just scream, "West Nile, WEST NILE!" They'll leave you alone. I Guarantee it.
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posted by Rich Rosenthal II at 10:59 PM
5 Comments:
There is a window cleaner commercial that showed two crows sitting on a branch talking about how clean the windows were. When West Nile hit Illinois bad in 2002 the advertisers altered the crows from being all black to having white chests.
Funny? Or just sad that I notice shit like that ?
west nile. WEST NILE!!
yes! I'm gonna have to give that a go..
I agree; crows falling from trees is pretty damn freaky. and sick old men too.
Bah mr anon is a spammer.
Cyn -- observation powers are always good.
Dana -- Thank you I try.
Carrie -- I could just se you walking down the street yelling that, "West nile, WEST NILE!"
Anthony -- Thank you but I won neener neener neener, heh
mmm. deep woods off smells so goooood!...the original kind, not the "fresh scent" crap my sister buys and the mosquitos don't seem to mind. just don't get any in your mouth (don't ask....) it makeths dthe tongueh numb.
Yes I have accidently tasted of the Off stuff too. Ick Ick.
Now write something! heh.
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