Football Again
If I were a praying man I'd be down on my knees in supplication, hoping for a divine hand to save us from the super marketing blitz that is Superbowl Sunday. A inexplicable meteorological event in Detroit. Perhaps sever sunspots. Nothing Major. I'm not asking for a temporary black hole or anything.
So what is my problem? Well first there is the game where three hundred pound men run at each other at top speed. We say it is so much better than the gladiator games of yore, but at least they killed maimed in those matches. In modern times a guy works all his life towards the goal of being a professional athlete and then when the game injures em we pretty much toss em aside and look for new heros in next years draft pick.
Lets talk about the draft. People go to school for a couple years on scholarships. They spend a portion of the school year out of class traveling to sporting events. Many never graduate. Universities spend time and resources on these athletes as a sort of farming program for professional sports teams.
Now lets talk about the most evil phrase uttered by people who watch the super bowl, "I only watch it for the commercials." The Christmas holiday three month marketing bonanza is just barely put away for the year (radio shack was still milking some of there spots) and now comes the dream day, the marketeers wet dream: The largest captive viewing audience of the year. People are excited. They cant wait to see the commercials. Every laugh, every gasp, every astonished and outraged cry will give the marketing gods an orgasm. On Monday the people with the flashiest and nekkidest commercials will be rewarded. Stock prices will rise.
So here is my prediction for tomorrow. Ford will have a very patriotic themed commercial. Flags may wave. They are moving forward. It is an innovative company (never mind the people who lost there jobs). Some unheard of internet retailer will try to launch their business with a sexy commercial. Victoria's secret will have take advantage of this growing female audience to launch a new spot.
Oh and one football team will beat the other. There may be something called overtime. People in Chicago will mention the 85 Bears at least once during the day.
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So what is my problem? Well first there is the game where three hundred pound men run at each other at top speed. We say it is so much better than the gladiator games of yore, but at least they killed maimed in those matches. In modern times a guy works all his life towards the goal of being a professional athlete and then when the game injures em we pretty much toss em aside and look for new heros in next years draft pick.
Lets talk about the draft. People go to school for a couple years on scholarships. They spend a portion of the school year out of class traveling to sporting events. Many never graduate. Universities spend time and resources on these athletes as a sort of farming program for professional sports teams.
Now lets talk about the most evil phrase uttered by people who watch the super bowl, "I only watch it for the commercials." The Christmas holiday three month marketing bonanza is just barely put away for the year (radio shack was still milking some of there spots) and now comes the dream day, the marketeers wet dream: The largest captive viewing audience of the year. People are excited. They cant wait to see the commercials. Every laugh, every gasp, every astonished and outraged cry will give the marketing gods an orgasm. On Monday the people with the flashiest and nekkidest commercials will be rewarded. Stock prices will rise.
So here is my prediction for tomorrow. Ford will have a very patriotic themed commercial. Flags may wave. They are moving forward. It is an innovative company (never mind the people who lost there jobs). Some unheard of internet retailer will try to launch their business with a sexy commercial. Victoria's secret will have take advantage of this growing female audience to launch a new spot.
Oh and one football team will beat the other. There may be something called overtime. People in Chicago will mention the 85 Bears at least once during the day.
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posted by Rich Rosenthal II at 2:03 AM
4 Comments:
I only watch it for the snacking opportunities.
im a guilty commercial watcher
I've always despised the use of resources for people who aren't even going to pass their electives without some form of help--so don't get me wrong.
But i love football. I can't get enough. Sunday and Monday night will not be so exiciting until next season. I love watching large men run full speed into each other over an oddly shaped ball.
And while the cat herding commercial from a few years back is awesome, along with the Clydesdale commericals (all of them), I must agree that watching just to see the commercials is a little weird--but to each his own.
ok. did anyone see the pepsi commercial....could they not think of anything other than "brown and bubbly" to market the product? When i hear brown and bubbly, i don't think of soda. anyone else?
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